Crowd shot masthead ApologetiX Logo Keith Haynie plays bassBill Hubauer plays lead guitarJ. Jackson sings leadJimmy Vegas Tanner plays drums

What songs are on "Wise Up and Rock" (2011)?

Here's what's on our 19th CD, Wise Up and Rock, which was released on download on October 31, 2011 and had its official CD release on November 12, 2011. Because it came out after our first 11 Classics compilations, which were released in December 2010, Wise Up and Rock is technically our 30th CD.

1. Working for the Weakened (Working for the Weekend by Loverboy)
2. Your Lunch (Your Love by The Outfield)
3. Keep Your Ham to Yourself (Keep Your Hands to Yourself by The Georgia Satellites)
4. Don't Stop Till Egypt (Don't Stop Believin' by Journey)
5. Judge! (Jump by Van Halen)
6. The Power Above (The Power of Love by Huey Lewis and the News)
7. Monkeys for Uncles (Money for Nothing by Dire Straits)
8. Too Much Grime on My Hands (Too Much Time on My Hands by Styx)
9. Hosanna (Rosanna by Toto)
10. Jesse's Boy (Jessie's Girl by Rick Springfield)
11. Dancing With the Ark (Dancing in the Dark by Bruce Springsteen)
12. Fishin' on a Pier (Livin' on a Prayer by Bon Jovi)
13. Mister Christian (Sister Christian by Night Ranger)
14. Dude (Would Like to Save Me) (Dude (Looks Like a Lady) by Aerosmith)
15. The Atheists (The Way it is by Bruce Hornsby and the Range)
16. Timeline (Limelight by Rush)
17. 80's Medley: Octagon But Not Forgotten
Read Acts (Relax by Frankie Goes to Hollywood)
Bartimaeus Eyes (Bette Davis Eyes by Kim Carnes)
Sweet Jesus Made a Whip (Sweet Dreams Are Made of This by Eurhythmics)
Psalm Passage at Night (Sunglasses at Night by Corey Hart)
Hundred Nineteenth Psalm (Hungry Like the Wolf by Duran Duran)
One Thing Leads to the Father (One Thing Leads to Another by The Fixx)
They Blindly Speak of Science (She Blinded Me With Science by Thomas Dolby)
I Can't Grow From That (Nor Can You) (I Can't Go for That (No Can Do) by Hall & Oates)
James 1:3 (Take on Me by A-ha)
Wicked (Whip it by Devo)

Here are the lyrics:

Working for the Weakened
Parody of "Working for the Weekend" performed by Loverboy and written by Paul Dean, Mike Reno & Matt Frenette
(2 Corinthians 12:5-10; Isaiah 40:28-31, 42:3; James 3:2, Joel 3:10)

Everyone's watching – they see what you've been through
Yeah, you've been broken – that's true
Everyone stumbles – when you fall down you find
Second Corinthians 12:10 and 9 --10 and 9

And the Lord, He works in all our weakness
And the Lord, He wants us to know that
Everybody's growin' strong who seeks Him
And the Lord redeems their circumstance

You wanna be someone smart?
You'd better soften your heart
You wanna be in control?
C'mon, baby, let go!

Everyone look in Isaiah 42
He'll never break you if you're bruised
If your wick's smolderin' – He won't snuff it out
Just keep on waitin' and don't get proud

And the Lord, He works in all our weakness
Listen, buddy, once I didn't know that
Everybody showin' off can't please Him
Everybody needs to check their stance
CHORUS

You wanna be someone smart?
You'd better soften your heart
You wanna be in control?
C'mon, baby, let go!
You wanna be someone smart?
You'd better soften your heart
You wanna be in control?
C'mon, baby, let go!

2 Corinthians 12:9-10
But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
Your Lunch
Parody of "Your Love" performed by The Outfield and written by John Frederick Spinks
(Jonah 1:1-2:10)

Jonah's on a vacation far away
But a whale just took it over
Here's some of the things he could prob'ly say
You know I like my whales a little less closer
I just hope that you don't munch or bite
Are you gonna lose your lunch tonight?

I hate those Ninevites God said talk to
Nowhere to run now I'm in trouble
You know I don't think I make good food
Stayed three nights here I don't want to blubber
I just love the fumes your guts provide
And if you don't lose your lunch, I might

Though it's not dry land, I'll praise Him
It's comfy here inside this great big fish
It seems the whale is heavin' – I don't know
If I can ride the wave I'm leavin'

As I leave this place here I know the Lord
Said, Don't forget what I told you
Those Ninevites are doin' things all wrong
I'm gonna show them that I am God
I just want them doin' stuff that's right
I don't want for you to run and hide

I just want them doin' stuff that's right
I don't want for you to run and hide
I just want them doin' stuff that's right
I don't want for you to run and hide
I just want them doin' stuff that's right
I don't want for you to run and hide


Jonah 2:10
And the LORD commanded the fish, and it vomited Jonah onto dry land.


Keep Your Ham to Yourself
Parody of "Keep Your Hands to Yourself" performed by The Georgia Satellites and written by Dan Baird
(Leviticus 11; Mark 7:18-20; Colossians 2:16-17; Romans 14:1-6; 1 Corinthians 8:8-13, 10:23-33; Acts 10:9-16, 15:20, 15:28-29; 1 Timothy 4:3-5; Hebrews 13:9)

I got a little pigs in a blanket, gonna bring a ring of links
Of some sausage 'n' tenderloin bacon, green ham and eggs
Or eat some pork chops, how 'bout some plain old ribs
Always, no hoggy, no piggy, you know it's in Leviticus
My honey, my baby, don't put my lunch upon no shelf
She said, don't hand me no swine and keep your ham to yourself

Bacon, baby, bacon
Why you wanna treat meat this way
You know, it's still my supper choice
I still feel it tastes great
That's when she told me the pure meats
Were poultry, fish, sheep and cows
And said, no hoggy, no piggy, or food you get from any sow
My honey, my baby, don't put my lunch upon no shelf
She said, don't hand me no swine and keep your ham to yourself
(They're kosher here!)
See,I started to feel bad
And I was about to give in
That's when I started thinking about the New Covenant
The part that talks about dinner
I said, Honey, Acts 10:15 would suggest that I'm right
Please read Colossians 2:16, Mark 7:19, don't fight
And what about Romans verse 14:3 if nothing else
She said, don't hand me no swine and keep your ham to yourself

Mark 7:18-19
"Are you so dull?" he asked. "Don't you see that nothing that enters a person from the outside can defile them? For it doesn't go into their heart but into their stomach, and then out of the body." (In saying this, Jesus declared all foods clean.)

Don't Stop Till Egypt
Parody of "Don't Stop Believin'" performed by Journey and written by Jonathan Cain, Steve Perry & Neal Schon
(Matthew 2:1-18)

Just a small-town girl – living in a Roman world
She took a midnight trip out of Bethlehem
Just a bitty boy – born to make the world rejoice
He took a midnight trip out of Bethlehem

The king is in an OK mood – until the wise men leak the news
For a while they can spare their lives
If they run, and run, and run, and run

Angels racin', comin' down to pull them out
There's bad folks searchin' in the night
Flee, wise people
Heaven sends a warning, Joseph
Hide Him somewhere near the Nile

Well, King Herod, he ain't quite thrilled
"Every baby must be killed!"
He'll do anything – he's cold as ice – what's one more crime?
Run from Him – One with you's
The Son of God, the King of the Jews
For His kingdom never ends
It goes on and on and on and on

Angels racin', comin' down to pull them out
There's bad folks searchin' in the night
Flee, wise people
Heaven sends a warning, Joseph
Hide Him somewhere near the Nile

Don't stop till Egypt – go down to the pyramids
Flee, wise people, oh oh oh
Don't stop till Egypt – go down, yeah
Flee, wise people, oh oh oh

Matthew 2:13
When they had gone, an angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream. "Get up," he said, "take the child and his mother and escape to Egypt. Stay there until I tell you, for Herod is going to search for the child to kill him."

Judge


Parody of "Jump" performed by Van Halen and written by Edward Van 
Halen, Alex Van Halen, Michael Anthony and David Lee Roth


(Matthew 7:1-3; Romans 3:10, 3:23, 14:10, Proverbs 20:9)




I mess up – and someone puts me down


It's kinda tough -- with all these judges around


And I know, baby, just why you sneer


You've got to pro-o-ove to your conscience you ain't the worst here



Can't you see the speck in your eye's not exactly just a speck it's a 
beam


I think you're worse than you seem


I think you seem kind of mean




Nah! Might as well judge (Judge!)
Might as well judge!


Go ahead and judge! (Judge!)
Go ahead and judge!





Oh oh! Hey, who can say that

They have got no sin


You say you don't know – you won't go – to Romans 3:10


Can't you see the standard here I got from Matthew 7:1, 2 and 3


I think it's mercy we need

We can't just be Pharisees




Nah! Might as well judge (Judge!)
Go ahead and judge
!

Might as well judge (Judge!)
Go ahead and judge!




LEAD



Might as well judge (Judge!)
Go ahead and judge!


Forget it and judge (Judge!)
Go ahead and judge!





Matthew 7:2


For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the 
measure you use, it will be measured to you.



The Power Above
Parody of "The Power of Love" performed by Huey Lewis and The News and written by Huey Lewis, Chris Hayes & Johnny Colla
(John 14:15-20, 14:25-26,15:26-27,16:7-15; Acts 1:8, 2:1-4, 4:31, 8:14-24, 10:44-48, 19:1-7; Romans 8:1-27; 1 Corinthians 12:1-31, 14:1-40; Isaiah 61:11; Galatians 5:16-26)

The power above is a glorious thing
Baby, one man's weakness is another man's strength
Change your heart through a little white dove
The Holy Spirit – has the power above

Thumb through the Bible, and it's quite clear
You're stronger and smarter when you have God's Spirit
If you have Him, good – if you don't, then why?
The power above can give you a whole new life

And you don't need money, only faith
Don't need to sweat it 'cause the price is paid
Yes, all of a sudden in a room sometimes
A mighty wind blows by
That's the power above, that's the power above

The fruit of the Spirit it's not grapes of wrath
It's love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, faithfulness
And goodness, gentleness, self-control
That's the power above in the world below

And it don't take money, only faith
Don't need to study hard to find these traits
Your soul is a garden -- it can bear fruit sometimes
That you'll find in Galatians 5

The spiritual gifts God prepared
Yeah, for you to share
In First Corinthians (Chapter 12)
You'll find a list of them
And with a little faith, hope, and love
You'll feel the power above
Feel the power above
Can you feel it?

And it don't take money, only faith
Old Peter said it all in Acts chapter 8
He's talking to Simon, he talks to us still
You don't need nothin' to be filled
Be filled with power, be filled with power above
Got the power? Get the power above
Receive the power above
Receive the power above
Receive the power above

Acts 1:8
"But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth."


Monkeys for Uncles
Parody of "Money for Nothing" performed by Dire Straits and written by Mark Knopfler & Sting
(Romans 1:18-22; Genesis 1:26-30, 2:15-25, 3:1-24)

I want my missing links …

"Now look at them Dodos" – that's the way they view us
They say that Christians are a dead species
Then they worship – macroevolution
Monkeys for uncles in your history
Now, that ain't workin' – after we refute it
Then they tell you – that the Bible's dumb
Maybe then your sister was a ring-tailed lemur
Maybe then a lizard was your mum
They've got to insult us to sway others
Because they're missin' the missin' links
They've got to lose the Originator
They've got to prove these other theories

That little maggot with the earwig and the stinkbug
They're buggies, but listen here
That little maggot could become an X-man
That little maggot needs a billion years
They've got to insult us to sway others
Because they're missin' the missin' links
They've got to use their imaginations
They've got to prove these other theories

Sure they mean well …
Huh?

They've got to insult us to sway others
Because they're missin' the missin' links
Get God removed from the situation
They've got to prove these other theories

They should've learned they're playin' with fire
They could get burned, but they get numb
Look at that drama they got from trickin' us with Java Man
Ain't that guy handsome?
And what's up with that? Who's that?
Why's that annoy us?
There ain't no right and wrong -- we're like the chimpanzees
Oh, that ain't workin' -- macroevolution
Get your monkeys for uncles in your history

They've got to insult us to sway others
Because they're missin' the missin' links
They've got to lose the Originator
They've got to prove these other theories


Oh, that ain't workin' – that's the way I view it
I beg to differ on your empty theory
That ain't workin' – that's no way to prove it
Get your monkeys for uncles in your history
Monkeys for uncles – history
Monkeys for uncles – history

I want my, I want my, I want my missing links
I want my, I want my, I want my missing links

Romans 1:21
For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened.


Too Much Grime on My Hands
Parody of "Too Much Time on My Hands" performed by Styx and written by Tommy Shaw
(Matthew 27:11-26, Mark 15:1-15, Luke 23:1-25, John 18:28-19:22)

Well, I'm sick of all this harsh rule
I'm Pontius Pilate that's who
Got those zealous confused Jews
And I've given up home, all those happy days in Rome
And the battles of old too
Is there anyone here who's not crazy?
Is there anyone here who's sane at all?

Well, I'm so tired of Jerus'lem n' all the fussin' and feuds
It's all that they do here
Well, I know that truism that there's no place like Rome
And I'd like to get there
Is there anyone here who's not a criminal?
Is there anyone who don't belong in jail?

Is it any wonder I've got too much crime on my hands
I'm sick of the strays that they send to me
I've got too much crime on my hands
It's hard to be me, oh the humanity
I've got too much crime on my hands
So just take Him away, take Him away from me
Too much crime on my hands
Just t-t-t-take Him away
I don't know what to do with this Man
Too much crime on my hands

Well now they sent me Jesus
Like I don't have enough problems
Now I need to try Him
He's got a dozen friends
And there's hundreds of enemies who all want Him dyin'
With His many wonders they're not impressed with Him
Is it any wonder I've got no choice?

Is it any wonder I've got too much grime on my hands
It's stickin' like paint to my hands, you see
I've got too much grime on my hands
It's hard to be clean when you're a man like me
I've got too much grime on my hands
So just take Him away, take Him away from me
Too much grime on my hands
Just t-t-t-take Him away
I don't know what to do with this Man
Too much grime on my hands

Matthew 27:24
When Pilate saw that he was getting nowhere, but that instead an uproar was starting, he took water and washed his hands in front of the crowd. "I am innocent of this man's blood," he said. "It is your responsibility!"


Hosanna
Parody of "Rosanna" performed by Toto and written by David Paich
(Matthew 21:8-16; Mark 11:8-11; John 12:12-14, 20:1-9)

All around Jerus'lem they waved their palms adoringly for Jesus Christ
Hosanna, Hosanna
I never thought that a road like that could lead to Calvary
Hosanna
All of us were true and we said we'd never leave when He foretold that night
Hosanna, Hosanna
We didn't know that they would look for the Lord inside Gethsemane
Palm Sunday here simply went away – Hosanna, oh yeah
Now He's gone and I'm at the grave
Meet you on the way, meet you on the way – Hosanna, oh yeah
Meet you on the way, meet you on the way – Hosanna, oh yeah

I can see the grave with Simon and the way the rock was rolled aside
Hosanna, Hosanna
I didn't know that the earth might move and break the seal they had
Hosanna
All I wanna say is that night I never ever thought the Son would rise
Hosanna, Hosanna
I never saw another human who they'd ever hurt so bad
Not much in here – seems He went away -- Hosanna
Now He's gone, but not passed away
Meet you on the way, meet you on the way – Hosanna, yeah
Meet you on the way, meet you on the way – Hosanna, yeah
LEAD
Not much in here – seems He went away -- Hosanna
Now He's gone, but not passed away
Meet you on the way, meet you on the way – Hosanna, yeah
Meet you on the way, meet you on the way – Hosanna, yeah

John 20:8
Finally the other disciple, who had reached the tomb first, also went inside. He saw and believed.


Jesse's Boy
Parody of "Jessie's Girl" performed and written by Rick Springfield
(1 Samuel 13:11-14, 16:1-13)

Jesse is afraid
Yet I know God's got a good plan in mind
'Cause lately Saul's been changed
He ain't hardly divine
Jesse's got him several sons, and there's one who's next in line

And he'll watch over the Israelites
And he'll love the Lord his God, yeah, I just know it
And he's holier in his heart and prays late at night
You know, where did that child of Jesse's go?
I wish to find and bless him so
Where can I find a ruler like that?

Displayed them all like a parade
There doesn't seem to be a king in the place
You know I feel so certain he's not part of this group
They run and tell their younger brother
But the boy is just a youth

And he'll watch over the Israelites
And he'll love the Lord his God, yeah, I just know it
And he's holier in his heart and prays late at night
You know, where did that child of Jesse's go?
I wish to find and bless him so
Where can I find a ruler like that
I guess he's slow
Where did that child of Jesse's go?
Where can I find a ruler
Where can I find a ruler like that?

When you look at appearance all the time
There's some stuff you won't see skin deep
God is funny He's not fooled by the size
And that's the way I'm supposed to be

Tell me, where can I find a ruler like that?
LEAD

You know, where did that child of Jesse's go?
I wish to find and bless him so
I wanna bless him so
Where can I find a ruler like that?
I guess you know
I wish to find and bless him so
I want, I wanna bless him so

1 Samuel 16:1
The LORD said to Samuel, "How long will you mourn for Saul, since I have rejected him as king over Israel? Fill your horn with oil and be on your way; I am sending you to Jesse of Bethlehem. I have chosen one of his sons to be king."


Dancing With the Ark
Parody of "Dancing in the Dark" performed and written by Bruce Springsteen
(2 Samuel 6:12-23, Ecclesiastes 3:4, Psalms 22:3, 28:2, 30:11, 47:1, 63:4, 88:9, 119:48, 134:2, 141:2, 149:3, 150:4; Luke 15:25, James 1:23-25)

I read about King David -- when the Ark of the Covenant came
Got caught up in the moment
Why don't we just -- worship the same way?
I ain't often inspired -- when I'm just too absorbed with myself
Hey there baby -- try some music and it'll help
We can't start the choir
We can't start the choir without your part
Lift God's name higher
Even if you're not dancing with the Ark

My savior keeps gettin' nearer
Readin' the Psalms and I'm learnin' how to praise
James says God's book is a mirror
Wanna raise high both my hands like Dave's
And I'm getting bolder
Might just give a little jump like this
In Psalm 150 it's all there
And in Second Sam-u-el 6
CHORUS

You sing along with the oldies
Cause you know them so well and it's O.K.
But take a song that is holy
How come, baby, you're not so free

Stay in your seats with heads down
But when you party you're up all night
You say it's not the same Sunday
Hey, baby, you best read Psalm 149
The time to dance is happenin'
I think it's written down here, yeah, it's right in this book
It's in Ecclesiastes
C'mon, chapter 3, give it just one look

We can't start the choir
Sittin' down -- quiet -- in the cold and dark
Lift God's name higher
Even if you're not dancing with the Ark
We can't start the choir
Worryin' 'bout your linen robe fallin' apart
Lift God's name higher
Even if you're not dancing with the Ark

2 Samuel 6:14
David, wearing a linen ephod, danced before the LORD with all his might ...


Fishin' On a Pier
Parody of "Livin' on a Prayer" written by Jon Bon Jovi, Richie Sambora & Desmond Child and performed by Bon Jovi
(Matthew 4:19, Mark 1:17, 1 Cor. 7:17-20)

(Once upon a time – God so loved the world ... )
Johnny used to work on the docks
Fishing's been his life since John was a pup
It's tough – to stop
He would work with Simon and James
Workin' for his dad – he made fish fillets
For lunch – mmm – for lunch
He says
We gotta hold on to what we're taught
Because we may be Christians doesn't mean we forgot
We got deep water and nets and rods, so now
We're fishin' for God

Oh ... the pathway's clear
Oh ... fishin' on a pier
Hey, my man, the lake is right here
Oh ... fishin' on a pier

Tommy taught his six-string to talk
With Keith, Todd, and me
Makin' music Vegas rocks those drums
Mmm ... his drums
Jesus gave us somethin' to say
Now Christ's in our lives ... now we're fishermen
Parody's our bait ... some say
We gotta hold on to what we're taught
He called us as musicians and we're praisin' our God
We got deep water
And lots of rock and roll
We're fishin' for God

Oh ... the pathway's clear
Oh ... fishin' on a pier
Hey, my man, the lake is right here
Oh ... fishin' on a pier
Fishin' on a pier
LEAD

We gotta hold on – steady your rod
We fish for the ones that are called out by God
CHORUS

1 Corinthians 7:20
Each one should remain in the situation he was in when God called him.


Mister Christian
Parody of "Sister Christian" performed by Night Ranger and written by Kelly Keagy
(Ephesians 6:12; Matthew 5:38-45, 28:19-20; Luke 6:22-23; Philippians 2:5-8; Titus 3:1-2; 1 Peter 3:15)

Mister Christian, oh you're tired and numb
And you know that you're the only ones who say -- one way
They're not goin' by your Book anymore
You know, those boys they want to blame most wars on you, it's true

You go to them, but you're diced and sliced
Your kindness is despised
You see your rights denied

They don't know He'll show them love so vast
They're probably worryin' you'll do one last crusade – they're afraid
Mister Christian, they'll still watch your life
So just live it out before their eyes and prove – it's true
It's true

Go to them, put your pride aside
They're trying to pick a fight
But be polite and nice

Go to them, put your fright to flight
You're shining in the night
You'll be a light for Christ

Mister Christian, oh, they might have guns
But you know the Lord's the only one who saves, so pray
But you go to them
Yeah, go to them

Matthew 28:19-20
"Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age."

Dude (Would Like to Save Me)
Parody of "Dude (Looks Like a Lady)" by Aerosmith
(Romans 3:10, 3:23, 5:8, 8:1,10:9-13; John 3:16; 2 Peter 3:9)

That, that – dude would like to save me
That, that – dude would like to save me
That, that – dude would like to save me
That, that – dude would like to save me

Boozin' in a bar, I was floored
A Christian met me right by the door
He said, "God wants to come in your life
Tell me, hey, do you know where you'd go if you died – tonight?"

I said, "I haven't got time."
And I lied and told him, "I'm not afraid."
Forgiveness was the thing on his mind
And he whipped out a Bible, tried to show me the way
CHORUS

"Never judge the Book by its cover,"
The dude, he said, "It's not like those others."
Said, "God put these lines
Here like Romans 10:9
So everybody callin' Jesus' name could have eternal life."
CHORUS

(Baby if you call on Him now)
Let me take a deep breath
(Baby if you call on Him now)
Dude, could you review it all again?
(Baby if you call on Him now)
Tell me how to cheat death
(Baby if you call on Him now)
Do it, do it, do it, ooh whee!
LEAD

Ooh, how could He save me
When I'd been, I'd been, I'd been quite bad?
Ooh Jesus forgave me
Yeah!
CHORUS

Luke 19:10
For the Son of Man came to seek and to save what was lost.


The Atheists
Parody of "The Way it is" performed by Bruce Hornsby and The Range and written by Bruce Hornsby
(Psalm 14:1-7, 42:3, 42:10, 53:1-6; Romans 1:18-32)

Stranded in lies, mocking Christ
They ignore the telltale signs
Say they can't find a God
A man with the real truth hurt their pride
So they took Him to court on the day He died
They made fun and said, "Where's your God?"

That's just the Atheists
Some people never change
That's just the Atheists
Ah, but don't you believe them

Said, hey, little boy, you can't go tell another soul
'Cause your old book's not a-pproved
Said, hey, old man, how come you plan to shrink my faith
Did you really feel so threatened, because I prayed in school?

That's just the Atheists
Some people never change
That's just the Atheists
Ah, but don't you believe them

Well, they pass their laws and fix the courts
To help those who hate God a little more
And I know they've gone too far
But a law don't change the Word of God
You can punish me with a firing squad, with the lions or another cross

That's just the Atheists
Some people never change
That's just the Atheists
Ah, but don't you believe them

Romans 1:28
Furthermore, just as they did not think it worthwhile to retain the knowledge of God, so God gave them over to a depraved mind, so that they do what ought not to be done.


Timeline
Parody of "Limelight" performed by Rush and written by Geddy Lee, Alex Lifeson & Neil Peart
(Genesis 1:1; Revelation 1:1, 22:18-19; 2 Peter 3:3-10)

Living on enlightened planes, the professing ones feel
That those who think can't kneel
In search of some reality beyond the gilded page
Trapped in this ungodly hole, willingly detached
With insufficient facts
One must think up theories there to keep one's thoughts abstract

Living on a timeline, the university
Can't show you what's to be
Those who wish to see
Must look to Higher education
Genesis to Revelation
The gilded pages that God provided free

Giving in to fake science – caught in a clever lie
They dazzle our two eyes
And then pretend an ape is just a long-related friend
All the world's in need of faith to see what's clearly there*
The Father's hand in nature
He provided evidence outside the gilded page

Living on a timeline, the university
Won't show you history
Those who wish to see
Must look to Higher education
Genesis to Revelation
The gilded pages that God provided free

Living on a timeline, the universe and me
The close of history
Those who wish to see
Must look to Higher education
Genesis to Revelation
The gilded pages that God provided free
The gilded pages that God provided free

*NOTE: Where the word "there*" appears in the line "to see what's clearly there," it should be pronounced in two syllables like some southerners do: "they-ur."

Revelation 1:1a
The revelation of Jesus Christ, which God gave him to show his servants what must soon take place.


80's Medley (Octagon But Not Forgotten)

Read Acts
Parody of "Relax" performed by Frankie Goes to Hollywood and written by Peter Gill, Holly Johnson, Brian Nash & Mark O'Toole
(The Books of Acts)

Read Acts, go through it
When you're done, you go do it
Read Acts, go through it
Anyone can come
Read Acts, go through it
Tell you what -- there's somethin' to it
Read Acts, go through it
Anyone can come

Acts 4:20
"For we cannot help speaking about what we have seen and heard."

Bartimaeus Eyes
Parody of "Bette Davis Eyes" performed by Kim Carnes and written by Donna Weiss & Jackie DeShannon
(Mark 10:46-52; Matthew 20:29-34; Luke 18:35-43)

He heard 'em holler, Ho!
Here comes Jesus Christ
The man would never know
He's got Bartimaeus eyes
He turned and looked around
He don't have any sight
He's sure he soon will, though
He's got Bartimaeus eyes

He says, Jesus
If He sees me
I'll be better, yes indeedy
"Cause they told us
That He knows just what it takes to make us whole, yes
You gotta get a Bible, look up the guy
Who's got Bartimaeus eyes

Mark 10:46
Now they came to Jericho. As He went out of Jericho with His disciples and a great multitude, blind Bartimaeus, the son of Timaeus, sat by the road begging.

Sweet Jesus Made a Whip
Parody of "Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)" performed by Eurhythmics and written by Annie Lennox and David A. Stewart
(Matthew 21; Mark 11; Luke 19; John 2; 1 Timothy 6)

Sweet Jesus made a whip
Threw 'em out and despised greed
The temple is more than a den of thieves
Everybody, listen to something
Money is what you use to
Come up with stuff to get used by you
Love of that money can ruin you
Love of that money's evil's root
Oooh

John 2:15
So he made a whip out of cords, and drove all from the temple area, both sheep and cattle; he scattered the coins of the money changers and overturned their tables.

Psalm Passage at Night
Parody of "Sunglasses at Night" performed and written by Corey Hart
(The Book of Psalms)

I read a Psalm passage at night
So I can, so I can – watch the way they prayed in olden times
And I read my Psalm passage at night
So I can, so I can – keep scraps of Scripture in my mind

I sleep peacefully
'Cause God's my security
And He's got a hold of me
I turn to Him in faith

Psalm 1:1-2
Blessed is the one who does not walk in step with the wicked or stand in the way that sinners take or sit in the company of mockers, but whose delight is in the law of the LORD, and who meditates on his law day and night.

Hundred Nineteenth Psalm
Parody of "Hungry Like the Wolf" performed and written by Duran Duran
(Psalm 119)

Tucked in the center, like a surprise
You'll see a Psalm with earth-shaking size
Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do
Ooh, it's acrostic in its design
Because repeating letters open each line
Do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do

There's much written down
I've got a hunch I'm bafflin' you
Shall I expound? The acrostic is found
In the hundred nineteenth Psalm
It's got a design – it just doesn't rhyme
And it's the longest chapter too
It's alphabetized --22 sections wide
It's the hundred nineteenth Psalm

Psalm 119:9
How can a young person stay on the path of purity? By living according to your word.

They Blindly Speak of Science
Parody of "She Blinded Me With Science" performed by Thomas Dolby and written by Thomas Dolby and Jo Kerr
(1 Timothy 6:20)

They're going through the motions
They're tryin' to tenderize the meat
They teach us evolution
Their speech is very Darwin-y
But they blindly speak of science
(They blindly speak of science)
6:20 in First Timothy

1 Timothy 6:20
Timothy, guard what has been entrusted to your care. Turn away from godless chatter and the opposing ideas of what is falsely called knowledge …

One Thing Leads to the Father
Parody of "One Thing Leads to Another" performed by The Fixx and written by Cy Curnin, Adam Woods, Jamie West-Oram, Rupert Greenall & Alfie Agius
(John 14:6, Acts 4:12, 1 Timothy 2:5)

The deception's worldwide
To what are you trying to pray
You've got a bland faith – your guru says
Communicate with any god you please
You see I mentioned this to
Make a case for black or white
But when one little cross leaves you shocked – it's unique
You won't discover though you seek
I know the … Truth and the Way
Read John 14:6, baby, one thing leads to the Father
You tell me that I'm wrong – I've been a Christian too long, my friend
One way leads to the Father

John 14:6
Jesus answered, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me."

I Can't Grow From That (Nor Can You)
Parody of "I Can't Go For That (No Can Do)" performed by Darryl Hall & John Oates and written by Darryl Hall, John Oates & Sara Allen
(James 1:2-4, 5:10-11; Romans 5:3-5; 2 Corinthians 1:3-4, 4:16-18; Hebrews 5:7-10)

Jesus said He's with me all the time
That doesn't stop when things are scary and not so fine
You've got some problems no one wants, I know
You even prayed about it– now they won't go

Yeah, but I-I-I-I-I cried through many things that He brought me through
Hey, and I-I-I-I-I'd do only pleasant things if I got to choose
Yeah, but I can't grow from that, no – nor can you
I can't grow from that, no – nor can you
I can't grow from that, no – nor can you
I can't grow from that, can't grow from that
Can't grow from that, can't grow from that

Romans 5:3-5
Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

James 1:3
Parody of "Take on Me" performed by A-ha and written by Magne Furuholmen
Morten Harket & Pεl Waaktaar
(James 1:2-4)

Tough things await
I don't know what – I'm just sayin'
I'll face them anyway
But James says that they refine you
Trials await – I'll be coming through them all OK

James 1:3 -- They only
Make me strong -- They hone me
I'll see God
Whenever they're through

James 1:3
because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.
Wicked
Parody of "Whip It" performed by Devo and written by Gerald Casale & Mark Mothersbaugh
(Acts 3:26, Romans 4:5, Hebrews 8:12)

Let's admit it
In the past you slipped
Check on the facts
Babe, your heart was black
Well, you've probably done some wrong
You was wicked
Before you'd been around too long
You was wicked
To summarize this song
You was wicked
We're wicked – it's a shame
Change it up – get straight
Grow purer – you may say
"I'm too defective" – but God can make
The wicked – wicked good

Romans 4:5
However, to the man who does not work but trusts God who justifies the wicked, his faith is credited as righteousness.