The Basis of the Names of the Bassist
Tue., Dec. 27. 2005 12:37pm EST
You've probably heard about our bass player Keith Haynie's penchant for acquiring new names. Not nicknames, mind you -- first names. People often get his name wrong, yet he's rarely called by the same wrong name more than once. It all started back in 1996 at a Waffle House in Georgia, when a waitress mistakenly called him "Stan," and it's been one for "The X Files" ever since.
Well, he recently got another name, just in time for Christmas. Here's the story behind the aforementioned nomenclature, as told by what's-his-name himself:
I forgot to tell all. We went to church this past weekend and some in the congregation gave us Christmas cards. Someone gave me a card before Krista came in the church door. She heard me and Sam laughing and asked us what we were laughing at and to pipe down. I handed her the card and it was written to Krista and Jeff. Sam and I didn't have the heart to tell the elder lady it was wrong. I saved the card and the envelope to show you guys at the party but forgot. When it rains it pours. Two new names in as many weeks.
Keith (I think)
Keith also received this email a while back:
Hey, I read in the newsletter how your name had been mistaken so many times! And I am sorry to say that I myself have given you the wrong name as well!
Me and three of my girlfriends were at the concert you did at El Dorado, KS (you rocked!!). Afterwards we were mimicking the way you said "and EVeryting!" before singing "I Love the Lord With All my Might" and I accidently called you Mitch!
Don't ask me where it came from, but I was quickly corrected and have not since forgotten!
Sorry again and THANKS FOR YOUR AWESOME MUSIC! I am glad that there are people in the world who use their talents in ways to teach of Christ!
For the record (or the 8-track tape -- if you know Keith, you'll understand), here's the progression and origin of the names, as best as we recall:
Keith (given name)
Stan (Waffle House in Georgia 1996)
Ted (Ohio 1997)
Gary (Bradford PA 1998)
Stu (Lock Haven PA 1999)
Curly (McDonald's in Ohio or Indiana 1999)
Kevin (on the job in Pennsylvania by a thankful customer 1999)
Baby (All-night diner in Reading PA 1999)
Kenny (Denny's in Albany NY 1999)
Rich (church in Donora PA 1999)
Speedo (church in Donora PA by a pastor 1999)
Lee (concert in Houston TX 2000)
Mr. Galparin (airplane on Texas trip 2000)
John Crawford (I can't remember where but it happened 2000)
Brian (concert in Kansas 2000)
Frank (I can't remember where, but it happened 2000)
Sean (concert in Austin TX 2001)
Mark (concert in Sept/Oct 2001 - can't remember where)
Omar (same concert in Sept/Oct 2001 - can't remember where)
Cliff (photographer who took publicity shots 2001)
Ryan (member of Poor Baker's Dozen called him that at a concert in Minnesota 2001)
Ed (Some lady said this to Keith's wife, Krista, in October 2001)
Kent (Mickey Hall in Oklahoma July 2002, according to her husband, Tom)
Heath (lady at hotel desk in Lansdale PA - May 2003)
Pete (concert promoter in Lansdale PA - May 2003)
Brad (DJ Dave Purin at the WJLU in Daytona/Port Orange FL - September 2003)
Mitch (concert in Kansas - July 2005)
Naynie (stage plot in Colorado Springs CO - August 2005)
Kelly (person at Bismarck ND concert - December 2005)
Jeff (lady at his church in a Christmas card - December 2005)
Remember: We don't count it if somebody TRIES to give Keith a new name. The beauty of this list of names is that they were names used by people who unintentionally got Keith's name wrong. No cheating!