ApologetiX: New CD, CCM Awards, CD Sale
Sat., Sep. 27. 2003 11:05pm EDT
J. Jackson, lead singer and lyricist for ApologetiX (That Christian Parody Band) here.
I have a hunch that this may be the first email that many of you have received in a while. We've been having trouble reaching some juno, hotmail, yahoo and aol addresses in recent months. I believe they have mistaken our newsletter for spam and have prevented you from receiving it. I've seen many old friends and fans at concerts who've told me they hadn't received a newsletter in a while, even though we've been sending them out every week. We think we've begun to remedy that problem. We have accounts on those servers, so we'll know when it starts working. (Just saying that so we don't get 17,000 "got it!" emails ;)
1."Adam Up," the New ApologetiX CD
2.Vote for ApologetiX for CCM's 2003 Awards
3.Close Call, Praise Reports & Prayer Request
5.Autumn-Up CD Sale
We're currently taking a month off from touring for several reasons: First of all, the recording, mixing and mastering process for the new CD is now in full swing. Second, my wife, Lisa, and I are expecting the arrival of our third child, which will probably happen this week (We'll let you know!). Third, Karl and his wife, Debbie, have been building a huge horse barn on their property, something they've been planning for years, and it's taken many hours and help from many volunteers, but it needs to be completed by mid-October!
1. "ADAM UP," THE NEW APOLOGETIX CD (PLUS TWO NEW CLUES)
In case you missed our recent newsletters, we are planning to release a brand new CD later this year, featuring 22 Biblical parodies of both classic and modern rock songs. We've decided to call the CD "Adam Up," for a number of reasons.
We've never really told the story of Adam & Eve in our parodies (briefly mentioned Adam twice and Eve once in two songs on "Keep the Change"), let alone Cain & Abel, two of the first stories that kids learn from the Bible. Those stories have been told so many times that it's easy to just sleepwalk through them when you're reading Genesis, consequently missing the fact that these are true stories about real people. So we thought we'd address that.
"Adam Up" features two songs from Adam's perspective, one about the Fall of Adam and Eve and the other about Cain and Abel. They are two of the most powerful songs we've written, so it seemed appropriate to get Adam's name in the title.
On a more humorous note, we've released so many CDs over the years, it's getting hard for our feeble minds to remember just how many we have, especially if you count the Christmas EP CD, let alone the numerous cassettes we released in the early 1990's that are now (and forever) out of print, even though some of you diehard fans insist on including them in discographies on your websites :) So what number CD is this for us? Depends on whether you count the Christmas one. What number album is this? Depends on whether you count those old projects and/or the Christmas one. So if somebody asks, we can just say, "Add Žem up." Of course, we'll spell it "Adam Up."
It's only appropriate that a CD associated with Adam should be released in the fall. Consequently, we plan to release "Adam Up" in late November. We'll give you an official release date in the weeks to come. Stay tuned. But the important thing is you should have it in time for Christmas shopping season.
Those of you who have been email subscribers for a while know that we have a tradition of giving clues about the songs on each upcoming CD. This time around, we're going to do that and even more. There's a special webpage for you that includes the first two clues and the cover artwork, plus a special thermometer which will help you track the progress of "Adam Up" until it is ready to serve. Here's the link, especially for you:
I'll include the two latest clues here:
"Downer of a Sister" A humorous look at the morning after Jacob unknowingly married Leah instead of Rachel ... as seen from the perspectives of Leah, Jacob and Laban. This parody of a hard-rocking hit from 2001 has Leah and Jacob doing some occasional screaming, but wouldn't you scream if you found out you married the wrong sister OR if your dad forced you to marry somebody you knew didn't love you? Surprisingly, a simplified version of the song we spoofed here was actually one of the five most popular downloaded cell phone ringer tones earlier this year, which is funny, because this isn't some simple song like "Chopsticks."
"Sweet Oholibamah" Jacob wasn't the only one in the family who had problems caused by multiple wives. In this song, Jacob's ever-so-slightly-older brother, Esau, tells the story of his multiple wives, including one named Oholibama (Genesis 36:2-3), and the problems both he and they have had with his mother. This is a song even Forrest Gump could dance to. The Florida-based group who performed the original version recently released a new album, and this is one of the hits on it.
2. VOTE FOR APOLOGETIX FOR CCM'S 2003 AWARDS
CCM (Contemporary Christian Music) Magazine, the leading magazine for contemporary Christian music for the past 25 years, is holding its 2003 CCM Readers' Awards and has opened it up for Internet voting. I'm a long-time subscriber and plan to vote. Many of you have probably read the magazine at one time or another.
ApologetiX has never been featured in the magazine, although we have advertised numerous times in the past and plan to run full page ads in the November, December and January issues this year. To be frank, not having been featured in the past may be a blessing in disguise ů no publicity can be better than a bad review by a critic who doesn't approve of Christian parodies :)
If you'd like to vote for ApologetiX (and your other favorite artists), the survey allows a space in every category for write-in votes, and it doesn't take long to fill out. NOTE: When I first tried to access the survey, it gave me a failure message, but when I tried again, it worked. The same thing happened when I tried to submit my votes. Then I tried again (I didn't have to re-enter my choices), and it submitted.
Here's the link: http://www.CCMmagazine.com and click on the "VOTE NOW You Be the Judge!" button
If you have trouble with the link there, try: http://www.zoomerang.com/recipient/survey.zgi?ID=0NRG1QFG2Q6T&PIN=GR8DEGYQ01NF
Some of the choices for which you may wish to consider ApologetiX are:
Your Favorite Band (Don't Do "Your Favorite Group" -- that's for vocal groups) Your Favorite Artist for 2003 Your Favorite New Artist Your Favorite Artist Who Hasn't Been on the Cover of CCM Yet
Voting ends soon! One entry per person. Winners will be featured in the January 2004 issue of CCM. I don't know if we'll win anything, but at least it will increase CCM's awareness of all the ApologetiX fans out there. Thanks!
3. CLOSE CALL, PRAISE REPORTS & PRAYER REQUEST
Earlier this week, the ApologetiX family got a BIG scare, when Debbie Messner (wife of our lead guitarist and producer, Karl Messner) was rushed to the hospital with what the doctors initially thought was a brain aneurism (Debbie was experiencing a sudden, very severe headache in both her head and the back of her neck.) They immediately performed a CAT scan and a very, very painful lumbar puncture to pull out spinal fluid to determine what happened.
Miraculously, it was NOT an aneurism, and appears to be nothing immediately life-threatening, although Debbie did follow up with her doctor the next day, and she says they're doing multitudes of screenings of the blood drawn in the Emergency Room, testing it for mono, meningitis, thyroid, and a lot of other scary problems that it could be. Her doctor thinks it's a reaction to her body fighting off "something." They just don't know what.
I asked Debbie to comment for the newsletter and she said, "I cannot tell you how relieved I was to hear that everything went OK with the spinal tap last night! All the doctors were pretty sure it was an aneurism, and (after scaring us half to death) they kind of put in motion the consequences of immediate brain surgery to clip it off. My heart nearly stopped! God really took care of me in that ER, though - I was so calm through the CAT scan and was just so thankful for the life I've had and praising him for all the miracles He's already performed in my life. In my mind, He performed another one in that ER last night."
Please pray that Debbie is completely healed, and please join us as we praise God for taking care of her!
Debbie also adds this update about her grandmother:
"For those of you wondering how my grandmother (Pauline) is doing, we received incredible news last week on her condition. As many of you already know from previous prayer requests, my grandmother (my Mom's mom) has been going through intense chemotherapy and radiation for cancer this year, and also received a few crucial blood transfusions as well. She had a follow-up with her doctor today, and it's good news! She's in remission!!
"We were all so scared of her appointment, and we're so excited and relieved about the news! She has to undergo a few cranial radiation treatments starting this week as a precaution against any free cancer cells trying to cause problems, but the official word is 'remission' and we are so incredibly thankful! And my family is very, very grateful for your prayers this year for this situation - God has truly answered them in so many ways! Please continue to pray that she stays in remission, and of course to Praise God for His abilities to heal! Thanks! Deb Messner & Family"
4. UPCOMING CONCERTS
Oct 25 - Belvidere IL Nov 1 - Norcross GA Nov 7 - Wausau WI Nov 8 - Green Bay WI Nov 9 - Greenfield IN Nov 15 - Corpus Christi TX Dec 6 - Hillsboro OR Dec 31 - Belle Fourche SD
5. AUTUMN CD SALE: CRACKED REGULAR CDS at $7, NEW CHRISTMAS CDS at $7
You've heard about "Adam Up." How about "Autumn Up"? Earlier this year, we ran a cracked CD sale and received an overwhelming response. I am still receiving emails asking if the sale is still on, so we'll run it again from the beginning of Autumn (now) UP till we decide to stop it :) That way you can stock up on the old CDs before the new CD comes out. Here's the scoop: We have a limited supply of CDs with cracked cases that we are selling at a greatly reduced rate. All seven of our titles are available. All of the CDs and booklets are in perfect shape. The cases are in various degrees of disrepair, some are in near-perfect shape while some don't even have cases, but all of them have the CD, the booklet and the tray card, so all you need is a CD case in good condition. I will autograph all of the CDs to help make up for the broken cases.
For a limited time only, we are making them available to our e-mail subscribers for $7 each.
We are also putting our remastered "Have Yourself a Parody Little Christmas" six-song CDs on sale for a limited time for $7 each. The CD includes the following songs:
1. "Micah No. 5" -
Parody of "Mambo No. 5" by Lou Bega
2. "Late December 5 or 6 B.C. (Oh Holy Night)" -
Parody of "December 1963 (Oh What a Night)" by the Four Seasons
3. "Santa Claus" (It's not what you think, though) -
Parody of "Panama" by Van Halen
4. "Hotel Can't Afford Ya" (Newly recorded version) -
Parody of "Hotel California" by the Eagles
5. "Manger" (same version as "Keep the Change") -
Parody of "Angel" by Shaggy with Rayvon
6. "Christmasnite" (same version as "Keep the Change") -
Parody of "Kryptonite" by Three Doors Down
Mail orders only. Sorry, no credit cards. Please make checks/money orders payable in U.S. funds to ApologetiX.
Shipping & handling is a flat rate of $5 for your entire order ($10 for orders outside the United States), no matter how many you order.
Simply print out this e-mail and fill out the form below and send it in along with your check/money order to the address at the bottom of the order form.
We must receive your check/money order before we ship. Don't worry about contacting us by e-mail. Just send the form via postal mail and include your name and address.
Please list the quantity in the blank space next to the title:
______ Grace Period
______ Keep the Change
______ Biblical Graffiti
______ Jesus Christ Morningstar
______ Radical History Tour
______ Christmas CD
________ TOTAL NUMBER of CDs ordered
x $7 Cost per CD
+ $5 Shipping & Handling
________ TOTAL COST (please make checks/money orders payable to ApologetiX)
City, State, Zip: ________________________________________________________
Please include this order form and print your address information on the order
Send your order, along with your check or money order, to:
Pittsburgh PA 15212-1977
God bless you all!
-- J. Jackson Lead Singer/Lyricist ApologetiX (That Christian Parody Band) www.apologetix.com firstname.lastname@example.org
"Jesus replied, 'If anyone loves me, he will obey my teaching. My Father will love him, and we will come to him and make our home with him.'"